Silly thoughts ? Not really !

Well, I have been trying to change for sometime now. And change is not coming way, or I should rather say I am not going towards change, at the rate I want to.
I want to stop yelling at people for the silliest of reasons, I want to stop getting involved in silly arguments, and more than anything, I just want to be looked upon by the rest as one of them. Unfortunately for me, certain deeds I have done in my past is not helping my cause. Like the way I smacked one of my friends in the face, for a silly reason, like the way I argued with people on the football field, like the angry way I shouted at people who shout anti-ManUtd stuff at the TV room while watching games, like the way I just looked away from people who really wanted to talk to me.

I thought I would get a clean slate, when I wanted to change. But now I realize,clean slates are hard to come by. You get one only once in your life.It is not up to me to wish I had a clean slate. I have a dirty slate, because I made it dirty. The only way out , is for me to make it clean and then possibly fill it with good stuff.
This is going to be tough....